Vashandi vezvepfungwa vanobudirira vave vachida kuziva kuti vabereki vanoita sei kubudirira kwevana. Zvisinei, kuwana chikonzero chaicho-uye-zvinobatanidza pakati pezviito zvakasiyana zvevabereki uye nekufamba kwenguva kwevana zvakaoma zvikuru.
Vamwe vana vakakurira mumamiriro ezvinhu akasiyana-siyana vanogona kukura mushure mekunge vane humwe hunoita zvakafanana. Kusiyana neizvi, vana vane imba uye vanokurudzirwa munharaunda imwechete vanogona kukura kuva neunhu hwakasiyana.
Pasinei nezvipingamupinyi izvi, vatsvakurudzi vakafunga kuti kune hukama pakati pemitambo yevabereki nemigumisiro iyi mitambo ine vana. Izvi zvinokonzera, vamwe vanoratidzira, kutakura kune maitiro evanhu vakuru.
Zvakaita Ongororo
Mukutanga kwema1960, nyanzvi yezvepfungwa Diana Diana Baumrind akaita chidzidzo pavana vanopfuura zana vekuyaruka. Kushandisa kuongorora kwekuzvarwa , kubvunzurudzwa kwevabereki, nedzimwe nzira dzokutsvakurudza , akacherechedza humwe hutano hunokosha hwekurera vana.
Izvo zviyero zvinosanganisira nzira dzekuraira, kushuva nekugadzirisa, maitiro ekukurukurirana , uye zvinotarisirwa zvekukura nekudzivirira.
Kubva pane zviyero izvi, Baumrind akaratidza kuti vazhinji vevabereki vanoratidza imwe yevatatu vakasiyana-siyana mitambo yekuberekwa. Kuwedzerwa kutsvakurudza kwakaitwa naMaccoby naMartin vakatsanangurawo kuwedzera chizvarwa chechina chevabereki kune izvi zvitatu zvepakutanga.
Ngatitarisei zvakanyanya pane imwe neimwe yemaitiro mana ekuberekera vana uye iyo inogona kuve nayo pane zvinoitwa nemwana.
Chiremera Parenting
Imwe yemitatu mikuru yakatarwa naBaumrind yaiva maitiro ekuremekedza. Munzira iyi yekuberekera vana, vana vanotarisirwa kutevera mitemo yakasimba yakasimbiswa nevabereki. Kukundikana kutevera mitemo yakadaro kunowanzokonzera kurangwa. Vabereki vezviremera havatsananguri chikonzero shure kwemitemo iyi. Kana akakumbirwa kutsanangura, mubereki angangopindura chete, "Nokuti ndakataura kudaro."
Nepo vabereki ava vane zvikumbiro zvakakwirira, havasi ivo vanofarira vana vavo. Vanotarisira kuti vana vavo vaite zvakasarura uye havaiti zvikanganiso, asi vanopa mazano mashomanana pamusoro pezvinoitwa nevana vavo kana kudzivisa mune ramangwana. Zvikanganiso zvinorangwa, kazhinji zvinorwadza, asi vana vavo vanowanzoramba vachishamisika chaizvo zvavakaita.
Maererano naBaumrind, vabereki ava "vanoteerera- uye vane maitiro-vanotaridzika, uye vanotarisira kuti mirairo yavo inoteerere pasina tsanangudzo."
Vabereki vanoita chirevo ichi vanowanzotsanangurwa sekutonga uye kudzvinyirira. Nzira yavo yekuberekera vana ndeye "yekusunungura tsvimbo, kuparadza mwana." Pasinei nokuti vane mitemo yakaoma uye yakatarisira, havaiti zvishoma kuti vatsanangurire kufunga kwemashoko avo uye vanotarisira kuti vana vateerere pasina mubvunzo.
Chiremera Parenting
Chimwe chirevo chechipiri chikuru chakaratidzwa naBaumrind chaiva chirevo chechiremera . Kufanana nevabereki vane simba, avo vane chiremera chekurera vana vanoita mitemo nemirairo iyo vana vavo vanotarisirwa kutevera. Zvisinei, iyi yekurera vana ndiyo yakawanda yakawanda.
Vabereki vane kodzero vanoteerera vana vavo uye vanoda kunzwa mibvunzo. Vabereki vanotarisira zvakawanda zvevana vavo, asi vanopa ruzivo, mhinduro, uye rubatsiro rwakakwana.
Apo vana vanokundikana kusangana nezvinodiwa, vabereki ava vari kukura nekukanganwira pane kuranga.
VaBaumrind vakaratidza kuti vabereki ava "vanocherechedza uye vanopa mitemo yakananga yemafambiro evana vavo." Vanotsigira, asi havasi ivo vanovhiringidzika uye vanodzivirira.Vanzira dzavo dzekuranga dzinotsigira, panzvimbo pokuranga.Vanoda kuti vana vavo vave nekutenderera pamwe nevevanhu vane mhosva, uye kuzvidzora uye pamwe nekushandira pamwe. "
Iko kusanganiswa kwekutarisira uye kutsigirwa kunobatsira vana vevabereki vane kodzero kukudziridza unyanzvi hwakadai sekuzvimiririra, kuzvidzora, uye kuzvidzora .
Kubvumira Parenting
Nzira yekupedzisira yakaratidzwa naBaumrind ndiyo iyo inozivikanwa semutauro we permissive wokuberekwa . Vabereki vanobvumira dzimwe nguva vanotumidzwa sevabereki vanozvinyima, vane zvishoma zvido zvekuita zvevana vavo. Vabereki ava havasi kuranga vana vavo nokuti vane tarisiro shoma yekukura uye kuzvidzora.
Maererano neBaumrind, vabereki vanobvumira "vanoita zvakanyanya pane zvavanoda. Havasi izvozvi uye hazvina maturo, havadi tsika dzakanaka, vanobvumira kuzvidzora, nekudzivisa kusangana."
Vabereki vanobvumira vanowanzokurudzira nekukurukurirana nevana vavo, kazhinji vachitora nzvimbo yemumwe shamwari kupfuura yevabereki.
Kubvisa Parenting
Mukuwedzera kune zvitatu zvakakosha zvakatangwa naBaumrind, nyanzvi yezvepfungwa Eleanor Maccoby naJohn Martin vakagadzirira chechina nzira iyo inozivikanwa sekusagadziriswa kana kurega kubereka vana . Chimiro chisina kujeka kuva mubereki chinoratidzirwa nemitemo shomanana, kusateerera kwakadzika, uye kunyanya kukurukurirana.
Kunyange zvazvo vabereki ava vachizadzisa zvinodiwa zvomwana zvinokosha, zvinowanzovharwa kubva muupenyu hwemwana wavo. Vanogona kuva nechokwadi chokuti vana vavo vanodyiwa uye vanogara, asi vanopa zvishoma mu nzira yekutungamira, hurongwa, mitemo, kana kunyange kutsigirwa. Mune zviitiko zvakanyanya, vabereki ava vangatosiya kana kurega zvinodiwa zvevana vavo.
The Impact of Parenting Styles
Izvozvo zvinogadzirisa sei maitiro aya ekurera vana ane zvibereko zvekuvandudza vana? Kunze kwekudzidza kwaBaumrind kutanga kwevana zana vepachikoro, vatsvakurudzi vakaita zvimwe zvidzidzo zvakatungamirira kune mhedziso dzakawanda pamusoro pemigumisiro yemitambo yekuberekera vana.
Pakati pezvakawanikwa zvidzidzo izvi:
- Maitiro emubereki ane mazita ehurumende anowanzoendesa vana vanoteerera uye vane ruzivo, asi vanoita zvakaderera mumufaro, ruzivo rwemagariro evanhu, uye kuzviremekedza .
- Mvumo yekuberekera mubereki inowanzokonzera vana vanofara, vanogona, uye vanobudirira.
- Kubvumira kuberekera vana kunowanzokonzera vana vanonyanya kufara uye vanozvitonga. Vana ava vanowanzova nezvinetso nehurumende uye vanoita kuti vaite zvakanaka kuchikoro.
- Maitiro asina kubvumira mubereki anotarisa kuderera kupfuura nzvimbo dzose dzehupenyu. Iva vana vanowanzoshaya kuzvidzora, vanozvidzika pasi, uye havave vakakwanisa kupfuura vezera ravo.
Chiiko icho icho chiremera chekuberekera vana chinopa zvipo zvakadai kune mamwe mavara?
Nokuti vabereki vane simba vanowanzoonekwa sevakanaka, vakarurama, uye vakarurama saka vana vavo vanowanzoita zvinoenderana nezvikumbiro izvo vabereki ava vanozviita. Uyewo, nokuti vabereki ava vanopa mitemo pamwe nekutsanangurwa kwemitemo iyi, vana vanogona kunyanya kudzidza zvidzidzo izvi.
Pane kungotevedzera mitemo nokuti vanotya kurangwa (sezvavanokwanisa nevabereki vane simba), vana vevabereki vane kodzero vanogona kuona kuti sei mitemo iripo, kunzwisisa kuti yakanaka uye inogamuchirwa, uye vanoedza kutevera mitemo iyi kuti vasangane navo wega internalized pfungwa yezvakanaka nezvakaipa.
Zvechokwadi, maitiro ekurera vana wevabereki vari voga anobatanidza nekugadzira kuwirirana kwakasiyana mumhuri imwe neimwe. Semuenzaniso, amai vanogona kuratidza chimiro chechiremera apo baba vanofarira nzira yekubvumira.
Izvi dzimwe nguva zvinotungamirira kune zviratidzo zvinosanganiswa kana kunyange mamiriro ezvinhu apo mwana anotsvaka kubvumidzwa kubva kune mubereki anoremekedzwa kuti awane zvavanoda. Kuti zvive nehutano hwekubatsira vana, zvinokosha kuti vabereki vadzidze kubatana sezvo vachibatanidza zvinhu zvakasiyana-siyana zvekusiyana kwavo kwevana vavabereki.
Kukanganisa uye Kururamiswa Kwekurera Vana Mutsva Ongororo
Pane, zvisinei, zvimwe zvikakosha zvinokosha zvekuberekwa kwevabereki kutsvaga kunofanira kuonekwa. Kushamwaridzana pakati pemararamiro emubereki uye mufambiro kunobva pachirongwa chekorrelational , iyo inobatsira yekuwana hukama pakati pezvimwe asi asigoni kugadzirisa chinokonzera-uye-effect ukama. Kunyange zvazvo pane humwe uchapupu hwokuti imwe nzira yekuberekera vana yakabatanidzwa kune imwe nzira yekuzvibata, zvimwe zvinoshandiswa zvinokosha zvakadai sehutano hwemwana zvinogonawo kuita basa guru.
Panewo humwe humwe uchapupu hwokuti mufambiro wemwana unogona kukanganisa mitambo yekuberekwa. Chimwe chekudzidza chakawana kuti vabereki vevana vakaratidza maitiro akaoma vakatanga kuratidza kutadza kwevabereki vashoma pane nguva. Zviitiko zvakadaro zvinoratidza kuti vana vangave vasina kukanganisa nokuti vabereki vavo vaibvumidzawo, asi izvozvo, pane dzimwe nguva, vabereki vevana vakaoma kana vane utsinye vangangodaro vanongotsauka pakuedza kudzora vana vavo.
Vatsvakurudzi vakaona zvakare kuti kuwirirana pakati pemitambo yekuberekera uye maitiro dzimwe nguva kunoshaya zvakanaka. Muzviitiko zvizhinji, zvinotarisirwa vana zvingatarisirwa hazviiti; Vabereki vane mazita ekuremekedza vachava nevana vakasvibiswa kana vanoita unzenza, asi vabereki vane michina yekuregerera vachava nevana vanozvivimba uye vanobudirira mune zvedzidzo.
Aya maitiro mana ekuberekera vana angavewo asingasviki zvachose. Nzira dzechimiro dzinoitawo basa rinokosha pakuberekwa kwevabereki nemigumisiro yevana.
"Hazvisi" nzira yakanakisisa "yekuita vabereki," akanyora kudaro munyori Douglas Bernstein mubhuku rake rinonzi Essentials of Psychology . "Saka kuvimba kwevabereki, iyo inogara yakabatana nemigumisiro yakanaka mumhuri dzeEuropean America, haina kufanana nekunaka kwechikoro kushanda pakati peAfrica American kana Asia Asia vaduku."
The Bottom Line
Saka chii chinotora kana zvichitaura nezvekurera vana?
Kuberekwa kwevabereki kunobatanidzwa nemitemo yakasiyana yevana uye nzira yekuremekedza inowanzobatanidzwa kune mafungiro akanaka zvakadai sekuzviremekedza kwakasimba uye kuzviziva. Zvisinei, zvimwe zvinhu zvinokosha zvinosanganisira tsika, maonero evana ekurapa kwevabereki, uye maitiro evanhu vanoitawo basa rinokosha mukuita kwevana.
> Sources:
> Baumrind, D. Vana-maitiro ekuchengetedza vana vanopedzisira vatatu mararamiro ezvidzidzo zvekare. Genetic Psychology Monographs. 1967 ; 75: 43-88.
> Benson, JB, Marshall, MH. Zvemagariro uye Kuvandudza Mumwoyo Mukumucheche uye Kubva Muduku. Oxford: Academic Press; 2009.
> Huh, D, Tristan, J, Wade, E & Stice, E Zvinetso Zvinokonzera Kuita Kuita Kuti Urege Kubereki Parenting ?: A Tarisiro Inofanirwa Kudzidza Vechidiki Vasikana. Nyaya Yevana Vechiduku Ongororo. 2006; 21 (2): 185-204.
> Macklem, GL. Murayiridzi weMuparidzi wekutambudzika Murairo MuChikoro-Vana Vakwegura. New York: Springer; 2008.