1 - Zvaunoda Kuziva Nezvezvemangariro
Chimwe chinetso chepfungwa chinowanzotanga kusina mhosva seushamwari.
Heino zveruzhinji pamusoro penyaya yepfungwa, kushushikana kwepfungwa kwakasiyana sei neshamwari yeplatonic, zviratidzo zvekunyevera kwehukama hwepfungwa, kuzvidzivirira kubva kune chimwe chinhu chinonzwa mupfungwa, nezvimwewo.
Nokutsvaga mari yekusimbisa mafungiro uye nguva nemumwe kunze kweukama hwepabonde, shamwari yekare yeplatonic inogona kutanga kusimbisa kushamwaridzana kwepfungwa kunokanganisa ukama hwehukama hwepedyo.
Nepo kune avo vanodavira kuti manzwiro ehupenyu haakuvadzi, nyanzvi dzakawanda dzekuroorana dzinoona manzwiro evanonzwa sekunyengedza pasina kuva neukama hwepabonde.
Nhau dzepfungwa dzinowanzotarisirwa nhau dzinotungamirira kuhupombwe hwepabonde hwakazara.
"Inenge hafu yezvinhu zvakadai zvekushungurudzika mupfungwa dzinozopedzisira dzava zvinhu zvakazara, zvepabonde uye zvose."
Kubva: MSNBC
Kune vamwe vanhu, migumisiro inorwadza uye inorwadza yehukama hwepfungwa inoreva pfungwa yekunyengerwa, kutengeswa, uye kureva nhema. Chero chikamu chehupenyu hwehupenyu chinonyanya kuchengetwa chakavanzika kubva kune mumwe wako kune ngozi kune kuvimbana pakati pevakaroorana.
2 - Chii chinonzi Emotional Affair?
Chinetso chepfungwa ndechokuti munhu asina kungovapa zvakawanda zvemasimba avo kunze kwemuchato wavo, asiwo anogamuchira kutsigirwa kwepfungwa uye ushamwari kubva paukama hutsva. Mukushushikana mupfungwa, munhu anonzwa akaswedera kune imwe iyo uye angave nekuwedzera kukanganiswa kwepabonde kana chemhemikari.
Kana iwe uchidavira kuti simba romunhu rakakosha, uye kana wako wako ari kugoverana mupfungwa nemanzwiro kune mumwe munhu, chinhu chinoitika mupfungwa chakatanga.
Kunyange zvazvo vanonyengedza vanowanzova vasina mhosva munyaya yepfungwa nokuti hapana zvepabonde vanobatanidzwa, vakaroorana avo vanowanzotarisa manzwiro ekunetseka sekuvhiringidza sekuita zvepabonde.
Zvakawanda zvekutambudzika uye zvinokuvadza kubva kune manzwiro emupfungwa zvinokonzerwa nekunyengera, nhema, uye manzwiro ekutengeswa.
3 - Nhau dzekunzwa dzakasiyana sei neshamwari yaPlato?
Ushamwari hweplatonic hunogona kuchinja mumamiriro ekurwadziwa apo kushandiswa kwemashoko ehukama hupfuura nemiganhu inowanikwa nevakaroorana. Chimwe chinhu chinotambudza chivhura suo rinofanira kugara rakavharwa. Chimwe chekusiyana pakati pehukama hweplanonic uye chinetso chepfungwa ndechekuti chinetso chepfungwa chinochengetwa chakavanzika. Chimwe chinhu chakasiyana-siyana ndechokuti vanhu vanobatanidzwa munyaya yepfungwa vanowanzonzwa kusangana kwepabonde kune mumwe nemumwe. Dzimwe nguva kubatwa kwepabonde kunobvumwa uye dzimwe nguva hazvisi.
4 - Mazano kubva Kubhuku reMuchato paMagariro Evanhu
Nhengo dziri mumatambo edu ekare akaroorana ari kukurukura nyaya dzepfungwa. Heano mamwe emashoko acho kubva kumakumbo.
~ ~ Kubva B .: "Ihu uhu hukama nemunhu wechirume akasiyana naye apo waisazonzwa wakasununguka nemudzimai wako uchiziva zvose zvese."~ ~ Kubva J .: "Iri izwi randingashandisa kurondedzera humwe hwemhuri kana humwe humwe humwe hune hukama husina kuwedzera huri hwepabonde."
~ ~ Kubva I .: "Ndinonyanya kufunga kuti hazvina maturo uye zvinoshungurudza izwi iro rinogadzira mhirizhonga kupfuura iyo inogona kubatsira chaizvo kuparadza ..."
~ ~ Kubva I .: "Asi kana munhu akaroorana ari kungova kudya kudya kwemasikati nemumwe musikana wepabonde, achitaurirana pamusoro pezvinhu zvisina mhosva, uye iye zvino obata firimu neshamwari - chaizvoizvo anoita zvakafanana neshamwari iyi shamwari dzepabonde - ipapo iye anogona kunge ari kuita zvepfungwa kana mudzimai wake asingadi varume nevakadzi vachirembera pamwechete pamwe chete izvo zvinoshandura zvakanyanya simba uye zvinoshandura izwi rokuti "manzwiro emoyo" rinonetsa zvikuru kwandiri. "
5 - Zviratidzo Zvokuratidza Kuti Unogona Kuva Nehukama Hwepfungwa
Heano pane zviratidzo zvinonyevera zvekuti iwe unogona kuva nemafungiro emanzwiro:
- Iwe uri kurega kubva kumudzimai wako.
- Iwe unofungidzirwa uye zuva nezuva pamusoro pehukama wako nekuwedzera.
- Iwe hauna hanya nekuva neukama newawakaroorana naye, zvichida mupfungwa kana zvepabonde.
- Nguva yakawanda iwe iwe nemumwe wako munopedza pamwe chete zvishoma.
- Paunotarisana pamusoro pezvaunoita sezvinoitika mupfungwa, unoti, "Tiri shamwari."
- Unozviwana wava kutarisira apo iwe unokwanisa kutaura kana kuva neshamwari yako zvakare. Nguva imwe chete pamwe chete inokosha kwauri.
- Iwe uri kugovera zvaunofunga, manzwiro, uye zvinetso neshamwari yako panzvimbo yemumwe wako.
- Unowana zvikonzero zvekupa shamwari yako zvipo zvako.
- Shamwari yako inoratidzika kuti inokunzwisisa iwe zviri nani kupfuura iwe wako.
- Iwe uri kuchengeta ushamwari hwako chakavanzika kubva kune wako wako.
6 - Mazano - Uri Kufunga Nezvepfungwa Here?
Kana iwe ukapindura "hongu" kumibvunzo inopfuura 3 yemibvunzo iyi, uri kufambidzana nenjodzi muwanano yako nekuva nemanzwiro emanzwiro.
- Iwe uri kunetseka kudzokorora uye kupesana mumhuri yako here?
- Iwe unonzwa uri kure nemanzwiro kubva kune wako here?
- Unoona zvakaoma kutaura nemumwe wako here?
- Uri kugoverana zvakawanda neshamwari yako kupfuura iwe iwe nemumwe wako here?
- Iwe unofunga kuti shamwari yako inokunzwisisa iwe zviri nani pane wako here?
- Iwe unokwezva zvepabonde neshamwari yako here?
- Ndiyo mutsara, "Tiri shamwari" here kuratidza ushamwari hwako hwepedyo?
- Mudzimai wako anoziva nezvehukama hwako here kana ushamwari hwako huri chakavanzika?
- Unotarisira kuva neshamwari yako kupfuura kuva nemumwe wako here?
- Apo iwe uchitaura nemumwe wako nezvezuva rako, hauna kumboita sekutaura kushamwaridzana kwako neshamwari
7 - Zviratidzo Zomunhu Wako Akaroorana Kuva neChiratidzo Chokunzwa
Heano zvimwe zviratidzo zvinonyevera kuti mumwe wako ave nechinetso chepfungwa:
- Wawakaroorana naye anotanga kubva kwauri kana kukutsoropodza iwe.
- Wawakaroorana naye anovanza kana kuviga foni yavo, anovhara pakombiyuta pakarepo kana iwe uripo.
- Mumwe wako anoita seanofarira mune imwe teknolojia kana zvinokuvaraidza zvichiita sezviri kunze kwebhuruu.
- Mumwe wako anoita sokuti anoramba achishanda maawa akawanda pa "purojekiti" neshamwari iyi.
- Uyu shamwari yewakaroorana naye inotaurwa nezvakawanda. Iwe unoratidzika kunzwa zvakawanda pamusoro pevanhu ava pfungwa (uye yako inoratidzika kunge inowedzera zvishoma)
- Mvura yako inokuudza chimwe chinhu chiri kuitika. Iwe unowanzovimba uye usingaiti godo nyore, asi izvi zvinonzwika se "kubva" kwauri.
- Apo iwe uchiedza kukurukura chimwe chezvinhu izvi nemumwe wako, zvinosangana nekudzivirirwa kana iwe unogadzirwa kuti uchinetseke.
8 - Kusiyanisa Maonero Ekuti Ungadzivirira Sei Muchato Wako Kubva Nenyaya Yomweya
Kunyange zvazvo pane maonero akasiyana-siyana pamusoro pekudzivirira mararamiro ako kubva pakurwadzisa nehukama hwepfungwa, tinofunga kuti imba yako inonyatsodzivirirwa kubva pane zvaunofunga nemwi mose muri kushanda pamwechete kuti imba ivakwe pane nheyo yakasimba yeshamwari uye kuvimba .
Vamwe vanogona kubvumirana kana kusabvumirana neanowanzoitwa mazano ekugadzirisa ukama hwako hwehukama kana ushamwari.
MuBhuku raMGG Neuman, Emotional Infidelity: Maitiro Api-Zviratidzo Chero Imba Yako uye 10 Zvimwe Zvinyorwa kuUkama Hukuru, anotaura zvimwe zvinokakavadzana: "Isai uye muchengetedze imba yenyu pakusatendeseka kwepfungwa nekudzivisa ushamwari nevarume vasiri varume . " Neuman anotenda kuti kuderedza ukama hwako / ushamwari "chinhu chimwe chete chinonyanya kukosha chaunogona kuitira imba yako."
Chimwe chezvimwe zvikonzero vamwe vanhu vanobvunza mubvunzo uyu kurambidza humwe ushamwari ndechokuti hunogona kuita kuti munhu ave nehana yega voga kune vakaroorana. Kuparadzanisa mumwe wako kubva kune ushamwari ndechimwe chezvinhu zvinonyevera zvekunetseka mupfungwa. Mumwe wako haana kodzero, 100 muzana yekodzero pamusoro pehukama hwemumwe wako, zvaanoda, uye pfungwa yepakati uye yega .
Dzimwe mazano aNeuman okudzivirira imba yako kubva pane zvaunonzwa zvinogamuchirwa uye zvinosanganisira:
- Kubatana mumwe nomumwe kaviri pazuva.
- Iva nemusi wevhiki.
- Ita hurukuro refu kwenguva refu pamwe chete kanomwe pavhiki.
- Rongedza zuva rose-ruchiva rudo rwekuda rudo kamwechete pamwedzi.
9 - Kufunga-uchapupu hweMhuri Yako
Iwe unogona kuita-uchapupu hwewanano yako nekushanda pamwechete kuti uve neukama hunobva paukama uye kuvimba.
Heano mamwe mazano ekuti ungavaka sei nheyo uye zvikwereti zvekuchengetedza imba yako kubva kune zvaunonzwa mupfungwa.
- Ronga kurarama hupenyu huri pakati nepakati.
- Iva nemazuva nemumwe uye ega nzira dzekuseka pamwe chete.
- Usarega kushatirwa kuvaka. Dzidza kuti ungava sei nekupesana kwakanaka mumhuri yako.
- Kurukurai zuva nezuva kune mumwe nemumwe. Taura nezvezvinhu zvinoshanda, zvirongwa, zviitiko, uye manzwiro evanhu . Zvinhu zviduku zvokutaura nezvazvo zvakakosha sematambudziko makuru.
- Ivai vatsigire mumwe kune mumwe.
- Ratidza ruremekedzo uye mutsigiri kune mumwe nemumwe.
- Nguva dzose edza kugadzirisa zvinorwadza nekukurumidza. Kuregererwa kunopfuurira mberi kupfuura kuedza kuva kwakarurama.
10 - Quotes Nezvemangariro
Nyanzvi dzekuroorana dzinobvumirana kuti hukama hwepfungwa hunokuvadza muwanano. Pano pane mamwe mazano kubva kune vezvenzviro zvekuroorana vachidzidza kushanda kwekusatendeseka pamuchato.
"Kusatendeseka kwatsva kuri pakati pevanhu vasingazivi vachiita zvakadzama, kushamwaridzana kukuru vasati vava kuziva kuti vakayambuka muganhu kubva paukama hweploniki vachiita rudo rukuru. Kusatenda kune chero manzwiro kana kuti zvepabonde zvinokanganisa kuvimba." Mhedziso: Shirley Glass, munyori we "Hasi Shamwari Neshamwari: Chengetedza Ukama Hwako Nekusatendeseka uye Kuporesa Kutambudzika Kwekutengesa"
"Zviri nyore kuramba kuoma kwepfungwa - asi zvinogona kutyisidzira imba." Kunobva: Dr. Gail Saltz paMSNBC
"Kana pane hukama hunopfuurira nemumwe munhu wawakave wakatendeseka zvikuru mukugovana pfungwa dzako dzakadzama nemanzwiro, izvi zvinogona kuita kuti uwane ukama hunoita kuti humwe ushamwari huwedzere-uye hukama hwepedyo, uye mberi uye mberi. kuva pedyo pedyo uye kushamwaridzana kwepfungwa kunowedzera, zvichikonzera kukanganisa kwakanyanya kumuchato-kana kuti kana kwete iyo inowanzova "zvepabonde." Chinhu: DearPeggy.com
"Nhau dzepfungwa hadzisi zvishoma zvinokuvadza kupfuura zvinhu zvenyama. Kutaura zvazviri, zvinowedzera kukuvhiringidza iwe kuroorana kupfuura kutengeswa kwepanyama." Kwakabva: Lisa Penn paTTTango.com
11 - Zvinyorwa Zvinobatsira Kana Muchato Wako Wakagadzirirwa neChiratidzo Chokunzwa
Pano ndipo pane kuti uwane rubatsiro rwezvenyanzvi:
www.MarriageFriendlyTherapists.com
www.SmartMarriages.com
www.AAMFT.com
www.DiscernmentCounseling.com
Kuzvidavirira / kutenga kubva kuAmazon : Mushure meNyaya: Kuporesa Maitiro uye Kuvakazve Chivimbo Kana Mudiwa Asina Kuvimbika , Kana Kuti "Usangova Shamwari": Kuvakazve Chivimbo uye Kuwanazve Unhu Hwako Mushure mekusavimbika
Iwe unogonawo kufarira kusvika kune vefundisi vako.
* Article yakagadziridzwa naMarni Feuerman