Nguva Dzakawanda Mhuri dzeMhuri Dzinofunga Kuti Ndidzo Dzinobatsira
Nguva imwe neimwe nyaya pamusoro pekugonesa inowanikwa panzvimbo ino kana kuti mumagazini evhiki nevhiki, inokurudzira email kubva kune vaverengi vanofunga sekuti nyaya dziri nenzira imwechete iyo inopomera shamwari neshamwari dzemudhakwa kana muropa kune zvinetso zvavo. Kunyange zvazvo nyaya idzi dzichirondedzera kuti nhengo dzemhuri hadzina kukonzera dambudziko racho, rudo rwevanhu vanogona kuzviwana ivo vachipa mamiriro ezvinhu nemabasa avo nekuita.
Al-Anon Mhuri yeChitatu C inoti, "Handina kukonzera, handikwanisi kuzvidzora uye handigoni kuchirapa," asi vazhinji veAl-Anon vanoona zviito zvavo uye zvavanoita zvinogona kuita kuti mhuri iite mhirizhonga.
Munguva ichangopfuura, pandakaisa nyaya pamusoro pekugonesa pakero yangu ye Twitter kana peji yangu Facebook, ndakagamuchira tsamba kubva kune muverengi waiva nemashoko akareredzwa:
Kupa Mhuri Mhosva Here?
Kupa mhuri mamiriro ezvinhu kuti munhu anenge azvidira, achiziva, uye VOLUNTARILY, akawana pamusoro pekudhakwa ndeye WRONG WRONG! Hapana mhuri (kunze kwekuti mhuri izere nevaya vanoita zvinodhaka zvisina kukodzera / zvinodhakwa!) TEACHES imwe shamwari yemhuri NZIRA yekuita zvinodhaka kune zvinodhaka! Saka ndepi idzi nzombe *** "kukanganisa" chirwere chemhuri, "nhema inobva?
Chokutanga pane zvose, kuva nhengo inoshanda yeAl-Anon Family Groups kwemakore anodarika makumi maviri, handina kupa mhosva yemhuri yematambudziko ewaini-ini ndiri nhengo yemhuri.
Hapana chinhu chandakamboita chakaita kuti nhengo yemhuri yangu inodhakwa uye hapana chinhu chandakamborega.
Kubvumira, Kwete Kubatsira
Asi mushure memakore ekuverenga mabhuku uye kuteerera kune dzimwe nhengo dzeAl-Anon dzichigovana zvakaitika kwavari, ndakasarudza kuti zvimwe zvezvinhu zvandaifunga kuti ndiri kuita kuti "kubatsire" mamiriro ezvinhu emhuri zvaive chaizvoizvo kuumba mamiriro ayo maitiro asina kukodzera aigona kuramba .
Panzvimbo pokubatsira mamiriro acho ezvinhu, ndakanga ndichiri kubvumira kuti irambe iri munzira dzakawanda. Iyi mibvunzo inogona kubatsira kuenzanisira kuti iwe ungave uchigonesa sei.
Zvakanaka-Zvinoreva, Zvakanaka-Zvakagadzirirwa
Dambudziko kwandiri, uye kune vamwe vakawanda vakazviwana vari mumamiriro ezvinhu mamwechete, ndechokuti ndakanga ndisingazivi kuti zvimwe zvezvinhu zvandakanga ndichiita zvaive chikamu chechinetso panzvimbo yechinangwa chekugadzirisa. Sezvo nevamwe vazhinji vane chinangwa, rudo rwakanaka-ruchivo ivo, ndakanga ndisingazivi nezve nzira dzose dzakasiyana dzandakanga ndichiita kuti insanity ienderere mberi.
Ndakanga ndisingazivi panguva yandakadana nayo mukurwara kune doro, ndamupomera, ndakamuvanzira uye ndakamuitira zvikonzero kuitira kuti agone kuchengeta basa rake nekuchengetedza mukurumbira wake, kuti ndakanga ndichimugonesa kuti aenderere mberi mune maitiro ake anokuvadza panzvimbo pokusangana nemigumisiro chaiyo yezviito zvake.
Zvichida dai ndakanga ndamurega kuti aite nemigumisiro yepanyama yekunwa, panzvimbo pokupinda uye achiedza "kugadzirisa" zvinhu, angadaro akasarudza kuti aifanira kutsvaka rubatsiro kune dambudziko rake.
Dambudziko reMhuri
Uyewo kufanana nevamwe vakawanda vari mumamiriro ezvinhu akadaro, ndakaona kuti zvishoma nezvishoma ndave ndakanyanyisa mukuedza kugadzirisa zvinetso zvedhakwa izvo ini chaizvoizvo ndakarasikirwa nehuwandu hwangu pabasa iri.
Zvakaitika zvishoma nezvishoma uye zvakanyanyisa kupfuura nguva zvokuti handina kumboziva kuti ndakanga ndakatambura sei nezvakaitika.
Ndakatariswa munzira dzandakanga ndisingazivi. Munzira dzakawanda ndakanga ndiri mupfungwa uye nemanzwiro chete sekurwara sechidhakwa, nguva yose ichipa mhosva doro kune dambudziko rese! Ndokusaka inonzi chirwere chemhuri . Inogona kukurudzira iwe uye kukukanganisa iwe mupfungwa, mumweya uye kunyange mumuviri usina iwe kunyange uchizviziva.
Asi handina kuramba ndichirwara. Ndakawana kupora kuburikidza neAl-Anon Family Groups . Ndakadzidza kumira kuva chikamu chematambudziko, apo mumwe munhu makore 25 apfuura akanditsanangurira pfungwa yekugonesa uye akaratidza zvishoma izvo zvandakaita kare "zvakabatsira" mamiriro acho zvachose.