Nguva dzose paunosvika pamba paunenge uine zuva rakashata, bvuma rubatsiro kana wakaneta, kana kunyange kutsvaga paIndaneti kuti uwane ruzivo kune mumwe munhu pamusoro pokuti ungagadzirisa sei kushungurudzika, uri kuratidza kuti unoziva kuti kutsvakurudza kwave kwakadini rinowanzoratidzwa: kuti marudzi akasiyana-siyana ekutsigirwa kwevanhu vanogona kubatsira chaizvo nekudzvinyirirwa! Zvisinei, marudzi ose ekutsigirwa kwevanhu vanoita kuti tisafanana -hurukuro yakareba neshamwari inonzwisisika inonzwa yakasiyana nehurukuro nemumwe munhu ane mazano akawanda ekupa, uye iyo nzira yekusimbiswa kwevanhu inonzwa yakasiyana neyorudzi rwekutsigira mudzidzisi kana mutapi angapa.
Pane nzira yakanakisisa yekushamwaridzana nevanhu here? Uye maitiro akasiyana-siyana ekutsigirwa kwevanhu munzanga anotitirei?
Mafuta mana Okutsigirwa Kwevanhu
Kunyange zvazvo kune nzira dzakawanda dzakasiyana dzekuti vanhu vanogona kutsigirana mumwe nomumwe, tsvakurudzo dzakawanda dzakaitwa pamigumisiro yezvikamu zvina zvakasiyana zvehupfumi hwevanhu:
- Kutsigira Kwemwoyo: Rudzi urwu rutsigiro runowanzobatanidza kunyaradzwa kwenyama sezvinongoita kana kugadzika pamusana, pamwe nekuteerera nekunzwisisa. Nekusimbiswa mupfungwa, shamwari kana mudzimai wako angakupa kukumbundira kukuru uye kuteerera kumatambudziko ako, achikuzivisa kuti vakanzwa zvakafanana, zvakare.
- Simba Rutsigiro: Rudzi urwu rutsigiro rwevanhu hunoratidzwa mumashoko ekuvimba kana kukurudzirwa. Mumwe munhu anopa rubatsiro rwekuremekedza angaratidza simba rauri kukanganwa iwe, kana kungokuudza iwe kuti vanotenda kwauri. Vadzidzisi vehupenyu uye vazhinji vemahara vanopa rudzi urwu rutsigiro rwekutendera vatengi vavo kuziva kuti vanotenda mavari; izvi zvinowanzoendesa kune vatengi vanotenda ivo pachavo.
- Kutsigirwa kwemashoko: Avo vanopa rubatsiro rwemashoko vanoita saizvozvo nenzira yekupa mazano, kana mukuunganidza nokugovana ruzivo.
- Simba Rinooneka: Rutsigiro runowanikwa runosanganisira kutora mitoro kune mumwe munhu kuitira kuti vagone kubata nematambudziko kana mune dzimwe nzira vachitora mamiriro ekushingaira kubatsira mumwe munhu kutarisira dambudziko ravari kuwana. Mumwe munhu anokupa rubatsiro rwechokwadi anogona kukuendesa kudya paunenge uchirwara, anokubatsira kuti uongorore mazano (panzvimbo pokukuudza zvaunofanira kuita, sezvinotsigira rubatsiro rwemashoko), kana mune dzimwe nzira dzinobatsira iwe kushingaira kugadzirisa nyaya iripo.
Ndeapi Maitiro Ekubatsira Kwemagariro Anoshanda Basa Rakanaka?
Zvose izvi zvekunamatira kutsigira 'basa', asi kwete nevose, uye kwete nenzira imwechete. Vanhu vakasiyana vanofarira pane imwe rudzi kana kusanganiswa kana mashoma masangano ekusimbaradza. Zvakakosha kucherechedza, zvisinei, kuti rudzi rwakashata rwekutsigirwa runogona kunge rwunova nemigumisiro inokuvadza, saka zvinobatsira kuziva rudzi rwehutsigiro rwevanhu hunodiwa mune imwe mamiriro ezvinhu.
Heano mamwe ezvo tsvakurudzo yakawanikwa:
- Iwe unogona chaizvo kuva nerutsigiro rwakanyanya! Chimwe chidzidzo, chakabatanidza varume nemadzimai makumi mashanu nemakumi matatu vakapedza kuongororwa kaviri pamusoro pemakore avo mashanu okutanga ewanano, vakatarisa kuti rubatsiro rwakagoverwa sei uye rwakaenzaniswa kugutsikana kwemhuri. Yakawana kuti rubatsiro rukuru rwemashoko (kazhinji mumhando yezano risina kukumbirwa) rinogona kunge rakaipa kudarika kubatsirana zvachose. (Ndakaona zvichikurudzira, zvisinei, kuti haugone kupa ruremekedzo rwakawanda; hapana huwandu hwekuremekedza huri 'huzhinji', chero bedzi ichokwadi.)
- Kutsigirwa zvishoma kunowanzozivikanwa kupfuura zvakawandisa. Chidzidzo ichocho chakawana kuti pamusoro pezvikamu zviviri kubva muzvitatu zvevarume nevakadzi makumi mapfumbamwe nezana (80%) vakawana ivo pachavo vasina kuwana rubatsiro rwakanyanya, asi chetatu chevarume nevakadzi vakataura kuti vari kuwana rubatsiro rwakawanda kupfuura rwavaida.
- Chimwe chidzidzo, icho chakaongorora 235 vakaroorana, vakawana kuti vaviri vari vaviri vakaroorana vanofara zvikuru kana murume akawana mhando yehutsigiro hwemagariro aanoda zvikuru. Kune vakadzi, zvaive zvakakwana kuti murume akanga achingoedza kugovera rubatsiro, kunyange dai asina kupa nguva dzose zvakanaka.
Chinhu chinokosha chokuyeuka ndechekuti kune marudzi akasiyana ekutsigirwa kwevanhu uye kuti iwe ungada kubvunza rudzi rwaunoda, kunyanya muwanano. "Pfungwa yokuti kungovatsigira zviri nani ndeyekuti imba yako iyanane," anodaro Erika Lawrence, anodzidza purofesa wepfungwa mukati meUI College yeZimbabwe Liberal Arts neScience, uye anotungamirira muongorori mune zvidzidzo izvi.
"Kazhinji varume nemadzimai vanofunga," Kana mumwe wangu achandiziva uye achindida, iye achaziva kuti ndakatsamwirwa uye achaziva kuti andibatsire sei. "Zvisinei, iyo haisi iyo nzira yakanakisisa yokutaura nayo muchato wako. Haafaniri hake kuve muverengi wepfungwa. Vakaroorana vanofara kana vachidzidza kutaura , 'Izvi ndizvo zvandinoita, uye izvi ndizvo zvamungandibatsira.' "
Usafungidzira kuti iwe unoziva rudzi rwekusigirwa wako, shamwari kana hama dzinoda; Zvakanaka nguva dzose kutarisa nevanhu kuti vaone kana rubatsiro rwauri kupa ruchinge ruchirova chiratidzo. Kana zvisingaiti, zvakakosha kuzarura hurukuro kuti uone kuti ndeapi marudzi ekutsigirwa kwevanhu vanodiwa pano. Uye zive kuti ndeapi rudzi rwekutsigirwa runonzwa kuti rwakakunakira iwe, saka iwe unokwanisa kutaura izvi kune vadikanwa vako zvakare. Hazvina kunaka kutarisira vanhu kuti vaverenge pfungwa dzenyu kana zvasvika pakutsigirwa kwevanhu-uye hazvina kubudirira kana. Ingobvunza zvaunoda.
Kunobva:
Brock RL, Lawrence E. Zvakawanda zvechinhu chakanaka: pasi pehuwandu nehuwandu hwehuwandu hwehutsigiro hwevamwe. Nyaya yeMhuri Psychology , April 2009.