Iwe unoratidzira izvi maitiro ekumanikidzira here?
Kunyangwe haisi iyo phobia yepamutemo, kutya kwekuregererwa kunenge kune imwe yenzira dzakawanda uye dzakaipisisa "phobias" yevose. Vanhu vane kutya kuregererwa vanogona kuratidza maitiro ekumanikidzika uye mafungiro anoita kuti vaparadze ukama hwavo, pakupedzisira vachiendesa kuregererwa kunotyisa. Kutya uku kunogona kuparadza, asi kuchinzwisisa iyo ndiyo danho rokutanga pakugadzirisa.
Kutya kuregererwa chinhu chakaoma kunzwisisa mupfungwa . Yakanzwisiswa kubva pane zvakasiyana-siyana. Icho chinhu ichocho chiratidzo chikuru chemuganhu wehutano hwehutano. Heano dzimwe dzidziso, maenzaniso, uye zviitiko zvinoshanda pakunzwisisa uye kuedza kubatsira kune vanhu vari kurwisana nekutya kwekusiyiwa.
Chinangwa Nguva
Mukusabatana kwechitendero , dutu re Freudian kuongorora , chinhu chinenge chiri munhu, chikamu chemunhu, kana chimwe chinhu chingafananidzira chimwe kana chimwe. Chinhu chinoramba chiri chirevo chokuti kunyange kana tisingakwanisi kuona munhu, munhu iyeye haasati achinja. Izvi zvinoshandura pfungwa ye "chinhu chinogara nokusingaperi" yakatanga kuongororwa nemudzidzi wezvepfungwa Jean Paget . Vana vacheche vanoziva kuti amai kana baba vanoenda kushanda uye vouya kumba. Iye haaregi kumuda mwana nokuti vanoparadzana kwemaawa mashomanana. Munguva iyi, mwana anoumba chinhu chemukati, kana chimiro chepfungwa chemubereki, icho chinogutsa chido chomwana chekubatana panguva yechipfupi.
Chinhu chinoramba chiripo chinowanzokura asati ava nemakore matatu. Sezvo vana vachikura uye vakakura, nguva dzekuparadzanisa dzinopera uye dzinowanzogadzirwa nemwana sezvaanoenda kuchikoro kana kupedza vhiki yevhiki kune imwe shamwari. Mwana ane chinhu chakanaka chinonzwisisika anonzwisisa kuti hukama hwakakosha hahukuvhiringidziki nenguva pasina.
Chinhu chinoramba chiripo chinogona kukanganiswa nezviitiko zvinotyisa. Rufu kana kurambana zvikonzero zvinowanzokonzera, asi kunyange mamiriro ezvinhu anoita seasingakoshi kune vakwegura anobatanidzwa anogona kuchinja kukura uku kunzwisisa kukuru. Somuenzaniso, vana vane vabereki vari muchiuto, avo vane vabereki vane nguva shoma yekushandisa navo, uye avo vane vabereki vasina hanya vanogona kunge vari panjodzi yekuvhiringidza chinhu chinogara.
Archetypes uye Mythology
Mythology yakazara nenyaya dzevakasiyiwa kana vanorambwa, zvikurukuru vakadzi, avo vakazvitsaurira ivo pachavo kune vavakaroorana navo chete kuti vasara shure apo anodikanwa achienda kunokunda nyika. Vamwe vanofunga nezvepfungwa, vakadai saCarl Jung , vanopikisa kuti idzi nhema uye nhoroondo dzakave chikamu chekubatana kwedu pamwe chete. Pane imwe nzvimbo yakanakisisa, isu tose takapinda mune dzimwe archetypes uye nenyaya uye takavaita chikamu chekugoverana kwedu pasi rose.
Isu tose tine nharo yedu pachedu, iyo isina kugoverana nevamwe asi inogara mukati mukati memusoro wezvinhu zvedu. Iyi nyanzvi yezvokwadi inoumbwa nekududzira kwedu kwekubatana kwevanhu vasina ruzivo kuburikidza nemafuta ezvakaitika zvedu. Kubva maonero aya, kutya kwekuregererwa ndechekukakavadzana kwakadzika kwepakati kunopesana nekunyanya maererano nekurangarira kwedu pachedu.
Zvakaitika kare
Mafibias akawanda anokonzerwa nezviitiko zvekare. Kunyangwe kana chinhu chako chinogara chisina kunyatsogadzikana uye iwe hauna kugadziriswa nehuwandu hwemashoko kana archetypes, unogona kunge wakasiyiwa pane imwe nguva muupenyu hwako. Nenguva yatinenge takura, vazhinji vedu takave kuburikidza nerufu rwomudiwa. Shamwari dzinoenda kure. Ukama hunoparara. Kuchinja kunoitika apo chikoro chesekondari kana kojiji inopera, vanhu vanotanga kuroora uye vana vatsva vanotanga kuisa pakutanga. Kunyangwe zvazvo vazhinji vedu tichigadzirisa kuchinja mamiriro ezvinhu, hazvisi zvisizvo kuti tibatanidzwe kune imwe nzvimbo mukutambudzika. Kana iwe wakanga uchinge uchinge uchinge uchinge uchishungurudzwa, zvakadai sekurasa mumwe munhu kurwisana kana dambudziko, unogona kunge uri mungozi yakawanda yekuwedzera kutya uku.
Migumisiro yehukama
Kuvhunduka kwekuregererwa kunonyanya kudikanwa. Vamwe vanhu vanotya chete nekurasikirwa nemumwe munhu ane rudo. Vamwe vanotya kamwe kamwe vazviwana ivo pachavo zvakakwana. Chero nzira, ndawana kuti vanhu vane kutya kutyasiko kazhinji vanotevera chimwe chezvikamu zvishoma zvepakati.
Tisati taona maitiro evaya vane kutya kutya, ngatitarirei nzira yandinofunga kuti hukama huripo hunogona kuchinja. Izvo zvinonyanya kuitika kune hukama hwepabonde, asi kune zvakawanda zvakafanana muhukama hwepedyo zvakare.
1. Kusvika Pakuziva Mumwe Nomumwe - Parizvino, iwe unonzwa kunge wakachengeteka. Iwe hausati uine mafungiro mune mumwe munhu, saka unoramba uchirarama hupenyu hwako uchifarira nguva yako nemunhu wakasarudzwa.
2. Hupenyu hweHuchi - Iyi ndiyo apo iwe unosarudza kuita. Iwe unoda kutarisa zvingaita zvigadzirwa zvitsvuku kana zvhizha nokuti iwe unobatana zvakanaka zvakadaro. Iwe unotanga kushandisa nguva yakawanda nemumwe munhu, iwe unogara uchinakidzwa, uye unotanga kunzwa wakachengeteka.
3. Ukama Hwakanaka - Chikamu chechikomba hachikwanisi kugara nokusingaperi. Hazvina mhosva kuti vanhu vaviri vanofambidzana zvakanaka sei, upenyu chaihwo hunopindira. Vanhu vanorwara, vane matambudziko emhuri, vanotanga kushanda maawa akaoma, kunetseka nezvemari, uye vanoda nguva yekuita zvinhu. Kunyangwe ichi ichi chiri chimiro chakanaka uye chakanaka muhukama, chinogona kuva chinotyisa kune avo vane kutya kutya, avo vanogona kuzviona sechiratidzo chokuti mumwe munhu ari kutora kure. Kana iwe uine kutya uku, iwe uri kurwisana newe pachako uye uchiedza zvakaoma zvikuru kuti usati utaure zvaunoshushikana nokuda kwekutya kuonekwa kuine clingy.
4. Chiedza - Vanhu vanhu. Vane matambudziko uye mafungiro uye zvinhu mupfungwa dzavo. Pasinei nokuti vanochengeta mumwe munhu zvakadini, havakwanisi uye haafaniri kutarisirwa kuti ave nemunhu iyeye ari mberi kwepfungwa dzavo. Kunyanya kana nguva yechando ichipera, hazvigoneki kuti kunoratidzika kunge kunopenya kuchaitika. Izvi zvinowanzotora mhando yemutauro usingapinduri mhinduro kana kushamiswa kwefoni kusati kwasvika kana chikumbiro chemazuva mashoma ega nguva.
Chii Chinoitika Zvadaro
Kune avo vanotya kuregererwa, ichi ndicho chinotendeuka. Kana iwe uine kutya uku, iwe unogona kunge wakanyatsogutsikana kuti zvishoma ndeye chiratidzo chokuti wako wako haasati akuda iwe. Chinoitika chinotevera chinenge chakatsanangurirwa zvachose nekutya kurambwa, kusimba kwaro, uye unhu hwakakosha hwekuita maitiro. Vamwe vanhu vanobata izvi nokuva vanyengeri uye vachikumbira, vachiomerera kuti mudiwa wavo anoratidza rudo rwake nekusvetuka mukati memheops inotsanangurwa nemumwe munhu anotya. Vamwe vanomhanya, vachiramba avo vavakidzani vasati varambwa. Kunyange zvakadaro, vamwe vanofunga kuti zvishoma ndezvakaipa zvavo, uye vanoedza kuzvishandura ivo pachavo muhukama hwakakwana mukuedza kuchengetedza mumwe munhu kuti arege kubva.
Muzvokwadi, zvishoma zvingangodaro hazvisi zvishoma zvachose. Sezvakataurwa, vanhu vanhu chete, uye dzimwe nguva vanoita zvinhu izvo vavakidzani vavo vasinganzwisisi. Muukama hune hutano hwakanaka , zvishoma zvingave kana zvisingazobvumirwi kunyange zvakadaro. Mumwe wacho angangodaro anozviziva kuti chii, chiito chinowanzoitika chine zvishoma kana kuti hazvina chokuita nehukama. Kana kuti angave akanzwa asinganzwisisiki, asi ataure nayo pamwe nekukurukurirana kwakadzikama kana kupokana kwakapfupi. Chero nzira, imwechete shoma haisi kukurudzirwa kuti itungamirire kukosha pakugadzirisa manzwiro omumwe wako.
Mudiwa Wekuona
Kubva pane zvaunofunga nemumwe wako, kushamwaridzana kwako kusina kuonekwa kunowanzobva kunzvimbo yakabva kuruboshwe. Kana munhu wacho asingatambudziki nekutya kuregererwa, angangodaro asina hanya nepfungwa shomanana nei chikonzero chake chaimbova nechivimbo, akasiya-shanduka achingoerekana achiita clingy uye achikumbira, kumubvongodza, kana kutora zvachose.
Zvakafanana nefibias, hazvibviri kungotaura kana kuti kukonzera mumwe munhu mukutya kuregererwa. Hazvinei kuti inguva yakawanda sei mumwe wako achiedza kukukurudzira, hazvingakwani. Pakupedzisira, mararamiro ako uye kusagadzikana zvinogona kutadzisa mumwe wako, zvinoshamisa zvichiita kuti uite kuti iwe unotya zvikuru.
Kurarama Nekutya Kubviswa
Kana kutya kwako kwakanyarara uye kwakanyatsochengetedzwa, unogona kukwanisa kugadzirisa nayo pachako nekudzidziswa pamusoro pemafungiro ako uye kudzidza maitiro matsva ekuzvibata. Kune vanhu vakawanda, kunyange zvakadaro, kutya kwekuregererwa kunobva mumatambudziko akadzika akaoma kusunungura oga. Rubatsiro rwezvemapurogiramu runowanzodiwa kuti ushande kuburikidza nekutya uku uye kuvakira kuzvivimba kwakada kuchinja mafungiro ako nemaitiro.
Kunyange zvazvo kubata chirwere ichi chakakosha, zvinokosha zvakare kuvaka manzwiro ekuti uri wega. Panzvimbo pokufungisisa simba rako rose nekuzvipira kune mumwe chete, shingairira kuvaka chikwata. Hapana munhu mumwe chete anogona kugadzirisa matambudziko edu ose kana kuti kusangana nezvose zvatinoda. Asi boka rakasimba revamwe shamwari dzepedyo mumwe nomumwe anogona kuita basa rinokosha muupenyu hwedu. Vanhu vazhinji vane kutya kuregererwa vanotaura kuti havana kumboona sokuti vakanga vane "rudzi" kana "pakiti" pavaikura. Chero zvikonzero zvipi, vaigara vachinzwa "vamwe" kana kuti vakanatswa kubva kune avo vakavapoteredza. Asi nhau dzakanaka ndeyokuti hazvina kumboitika kare.
Chero zvaunenge uine danho rehupenyu huno, zvinokosha kuti uzvikombedze nevamwe vanhu vakaita semafungiro. Ita rondedzero yezvinodiwa zvako zvekugadzirira, zvido, uye kurota. Zvino uwane vamwe vanogovana newe. Kunyange zvazvo ichokwadi kuti havasi vose vanogovera kufarira vachava shamwari yepedyo, zvinokuvaraidza uye kurota ndezvakanaka kune rimwe dombo rekugadzira sangano rakasimba rutsigiro. Kushanda mukudavira kwako kunobatsirawo kuzvivaka kuvimba nekutenda kuti iwe wakasimba zvakakwana kuti utsungirire chero hupenyu hupi hunokanda nzira yako.
> Kwakabva:
> Sonoma State University. Object Relations Theory. https://web.sonoma.edu/users/d/daniels/objectrelations.html